The Life Balance
Aarin Harper
Where did the last year go? As many of us take some time to look back on the last year I feel like 2015 for me was rather unbelievable, unexpected, unbalancing…well…it was “un-“. I sold a house that had been home for 10 years, bought and moved to a townhouse, divorced, launched this website with one of my daughters, this daughter also lived through a divorce, a daughter married, and had my job responsibilities change in a significant way, and that’s just the “big stuff”. I’m glad to see 2015 go and looking forward to 2016.
Have you lived through major life changes or life changes that felt major to you? (The way that you feel about the changes that impact you is all that matters.) You, we, have to manage our lives around what experiences come our way, choices that we make, and the impact that results. (The author of True Blue, Tracy Monteith, candidly shares her walk through many challenges). That’s life as a grown-up. Sometimes being a grown-up isn't as great as we imagined it would be when we were 13 years old!
You know that life is a mix of joy and pain, struggle and play. This brings to mind a song that I used to sing to my girls when they were babies, an old hymn called Day by Day. Here are the words:
Day by day and with each passing moment, strength I find to meet my trials here,
Trusting in my Father’s wise bestowment, I’ve no cause for worry or for fear,
He whose heart is kind beyond all measure, gives unto each day as He deems best,
Lovingly, it’s part of pain and pleasure, mingling toil with peace and rest.
Some may be thinking, “that isn't a very uplifting or comforting lullaby”, maybe you’re right; but it was a lullaby and prayer for my girls - my hope for them was an understanding that life is made of balance. Life gives us both pain and pleasure, hard things that we have to work through emotionally/physically, and then unimagined joy and peace. I wanted them to be strong and not surprised by difficulty. I think we often do harm by not allowing those we care about to walk through difficult things, although we do need to walk with them, supporting and loving as we walk. Difficult walks produce resiliency – resiliency is needed by each of us and grows as we exercise it – that is a tough reality. (Check out Brene Brown’s new book “Rising Strong” about resiliency).
My girls are strong and have had to live through more difficulty than I could've ever imagined for them – I am prouder of them and love them more than they may ever know. Understanding hard things grow resiliency I still wish I could've protected them from the pain.
All this to say – join me in wishing the past year farewell – look to this New Year with hope and expectation – be daring, care for others, and choose to LIVE LIFE WELL!
Shalom (Peace) to you in 2016!
- Aarin